@dlsims01: My co worker is so mad at me right now her eyes are bulging out like a pug. I don't know wether to call 911 or scratch her behind the ears.
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@thedailymarker: When you open your heart to someone, there is blood. Lots and lots of blood. And then you die. So don't open your heart.
@causticbob: In Russia, Vladimir Putin has said that the killers of Nemtsov "will be ruthlessly hunted down." He added, "It's cheaper than paying them"
@robdelaney: 23. RT @Highlights: Parents, at what age do you think it's okay for a child to get his or her own cell phone?
@geowizzacist: (after bedtime) 3:DADDY COME INTO MY ROOM! Me: go to sleep. 3:YOU HAVE TO COME IN BECAUSE I CAN'T HEAR YOU M: yes you can 3:NO I CAN'T