@DiamondLou69: My co-worker was accused of flipping off the boss. I told HR that it couldn't have been him because he never lifts a finger to do anything.
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@fart: my dream job is to be the FBI guy who nicknames criminals. someone blew up a fish market? Tunabomber. easy.
@ShoutingGoddess: You hurt the feelings of a person who was once the crush of a person who was once a friend of mine so you're a BAD person. ~ internet logic
@BoogTweets: *Full parking lot* Me: IF THERE IS A GOD, FIND ME A SPOT AND I WILL BECOME RELIGIOUS! *spot opens up* Me: NEVER MIND, I FOUND ONE!