@AmazingPhil: My cousins baby child keeps pointing at me and saying 'cat'
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@heroinsdemise: "Removing my make up" Or how I like to call it: "Reset face to factory settings"
@5exyunchained: A month ago I gave my number to this beautiful girl. She said "I will text you when I get home". I think she's homeless.
@OhNoSheTwitnt: If we get to have sex with our valentines on Valentine's Day I can't wait until Presidents' Day.