@PaperWash: My cover letter is just a picture of me in a sleeveless turtleneck karate chopping the word 'unemployment'.
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@GrillinChillin9: Mick Jagger: Hey Keith, come hold my new baby. Keith holding baby, whispers to it: I'm going to out live you too.
@sfreeze6: [on deathbed - calls for son] ".....if you highlight the shit out of a document, people will think you read it....."
@paralysing_word: If you think you're too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.
@Cravin4: My top 5 yoga positions 5 Napping Warrior 4 Downward Spiral 3 Crying Plank 2 Farting Tree 1 Drunk Hasselhoff