@TalibJim: ME: bae, you wanna go out? HER: hell yeah 😊 ME: ok pliz close the door on your way out I need to play FIFA alone.
@decentbirthday: [2025]
student: can i go to the bathroom
teacher: *slams revolver on desk* i don't know, can you
@ShoutingGoddess: I see your choices and raise you one eyebrow.
@knot_eye: This bottle of vodka was on sale.
So yes, I will party like it's $19.99.
@Ideal_Victoria: Shhhhh! I can't hear about how God spoke to you! I'm busy listening to my toaster tell me about his day.
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