@VestaTot: My coworker just took a broom and pole vaulted over the cubicle partition to confront the woman who accused her of being on speed.
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@kfoagkfoag: *me, struggling to please the members of our tea club* "Please, everyone! Why can't we all just get oolong?!
@dougbies: I like long, romantic walks away from women that try catching the bouquet at weddings
@QwertyJones3: Fun prank: Super glue a baby to the floor and see how many people try to pick it up as they walk by
@junejuly12: Her: I'm having a dry party. Me: Sorry, I'm busy. Her: You don't even know when. Me: You don't even know me.