@ISOremarkable: my dad didn't let me date untill i was pregnant...
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@Jenny4ashley: Interviewer: Your resume says that you're good at multitasking [me while painting nails]: Obvi Interviewer: Please stop touching my nails
@AJEatsCake: Making French toast is a lot like making regular toast. The only difference is that you use your tongue.
@samfromks: Heads up guys, if you ask your wife how to spell ménage à trois she's gonna want to know why.