@KatieKatCubs: My dad just called because he was thinking of me & loves me. And THAT'S why I never danced on a pole. Well, that and I got too dizzy.
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@thesulk: Whenever teachers say 'show your work', just write a bunch of numbers down and hope they're tired that night.
@michaelianblack: Internet, just because I bought shoes from you once doesn't mean I'm going to do it again. You're coming across as desperate.
@jtswhipped: I saw a woman with a lower back tattoo that said "Classy" and my brain leaked out of my ear.
@BlairLoudly: *dresses like a kitty* *climbs tree* *waits for new fireman husband to come rescue me*