@KatieKatCubs: My dad likes to come to my office & tell the receptionist he's my parole officer in case you were wondering how I turned out like this.
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@GrantTanaka: If it looks like a duck & swims like a duck & talks like an angry duck policeman, then you about to fail a sobriety test son
@Karate_Horse: A fun thing to do is take a group picture at a party. Then leave & print it at Walgreens. Buy a frame & place it on the mantel at the party.
@MrFornicator: When people ask me if I'm working hard or hardly working, I like to stab them with a pen and ask if they're hurting hard or hardly hurting.