@JediGigi: My Daddy taught me to lick it before I stick it- I say to the judges as I hang a spit covered spoon from my nose.
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@sad_tree: She's marrying HIM?! TODAY?! *cut to me sprinting across town to stop the wedding but I see a good dog at the park and pet him instead*
@juliussharpe: I don't get why everyone talks so fast in old movies. What was the hurry? There was nothing to do back then.
@jwoodham: Sorry I didn't text you back, but my body is like 70% water and I really didn't want to mess up my phone.
@TheSwanDon: Girls quote Marilyn Monroe relationship and life advice so much its almost like she wasn't a three time divorced, drug-addicted alcoholic.