@Tmoney68: My dancing style can best be described as "Guy On Maury Who Just Found Out He Isn't The Father."
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@nbadag: REPORTER: you say you spotted the missing hikers somewhere in these woods CLEARLY A BEAR IN A FLANNEL & AVIATORS: [right on mic] briefly yes
@lisaxy424: You people who don't wear glasses don't realize how gratifying it is to take them off and rub your eyes when someone's being a moron.
@hippieswordfish: 'welcome to subway how can i-' ME:*punches counter*WHY DOES THE KOOL-AID MAN CARRY A SMALLER PITCHER OF KOOL-AID 'sir-' M: IS IT HIS PISS
@inoj41: Kissing 101: 1. Open your mouth 2. Wider, that's it. 3. Stick out your tongue 4. Then walk towards her and pray she doesn't run away.