@IamEnidColeslaw: my date is in 2 hours, which means I have very little time to fix my glasses and fix my bangs and get a career and lose 50 pounds
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@BryMastas: Someday, I wish Twitter will come up with a new & useful feature for once, like a sarcasm indicator for the ones who never get it.
@BobTheSuit: Adult me must concede that a major contributor to global warming was kid me leaving the front door open and heating the whole goddam world.
@samalmightysam: You're born, you grow up, you start listening to a Pink Floyd song, you get married, have kids, you die, the song hasn't finished.