@Monicann86: My Doberman sits on other dogs to assert dominance. I'm going to try this with my co-workers.
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@Mr_Kapowski: [gently brushes your hair out of your face] "You're gonna be so pissed when you wake up and see your haircut," I whisper
@laureneoneal: Why doesn't anyone invite copyeditors to parties when we're such cool people out with whom to hang?
@StephenBCramer: My sister is holding her baby in one hand and a cup of Starbucks in the other, I'm going to toss her phone at her to see who gets dropped.