@envydatropic: My doctor prescribed a med that has "weight loss" as a side effect......I've never wanted to overdose so much in my life!
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@PaperWash: Remember kids, those light up sneakers won't seem so cool when wolves are chasing you through the woods at night.
@yenniwhite: 50% of raising kids is begging them to use their words. 50% is begging them to be quiet.
@breadzeppellin: Damn girl are you Schrodinger's cat cos you're in a box and all these nerds are talking about you? Sir have some respect this is a funeral.
@jonnysun: *slips on a banamna peel* *lifts up banamna peel w/ end of pen* somone get the detective,. somwhere out there, theres a nude banana