@Peteypops13: My doctor said NO drinking for 2 weeks,then we both laughed.
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@dafloydsta: 1. OMG will this ever end? 2. OMG will this ever end? 3. OMG will this ever end? -top 3 things on my mind when I'm in a a conversation
@StarWarsProblms: Vader: Remove my helmet so I can see you with my own eyes. Luke: OK. Vader: On second thought, don't. I have 30 years worth of hat hair.
@LMuenster: [orders 2,000 Big Macs thinking I'll only have to tell my mom 'I love her' for them] Cashier: that'll be $5,364.32 Me: shit
@InternetHippo: PARENTS: When someone offers you drugs, you say no! ME (going out into the world): I'm ready [literally no one offers me drugs ever]