@dumbbeezie: My doctor told me that despite my efforts, I'll probably live a long life. I'm taking the news pretty hard
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@leifromloihi: oh the aliens aren't speaking to us right now because idk they're pissed that we flaked out on that pyramid project they started or whatever
@clindsaysway: Guy at the Apple store suggested I turn off my phone once a week, so I slapped his face and ran out of the store crying.
@TheTweetOfGod: Jesus was the original child star who fell in with the wrong crowd and died young.
@InsouciantMan: Wife just looked at an 8"x8" picture and estimated it to be 12"x12". Perhaps you can see why I consider this a good thing.