@legreece: My dog doesn't always bark like there's an intruder in the house, but when he does he waits until I'm home alone and in the shower.
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@JermHimselfish: I suffer from a rare condition called OCDC, which forces me to salute all of those who are about to rock.
@noog: GET OVER HERE thunders across the bar as a harpooned rope impales a beautiful girl. The bartender smiles and shakes his head at Scorpion.
@SureYouDo1: For your anniversary, if your wife asks for something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in 3 seconds...don't get her a bathroom scale. Nope.