@FuckabillyRex: My dog seems happy so I took her meds to see if they'd help me and I guess at least I won't have any ticks this summer.
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@toastymoe: The longest 30 seconds of your life happen when you shut the router off to reset the WiFi
@IamEveryDayPpl: Me: Dear Santa... Santa: *scrolling my TL* I'm going to just stop you right there.
@jobless4eyes: Found a fly on his back by my keyboard. So dead. So sad. Put a cocktail umbrella by his head. Now he looks like he's suntanning.