@_Tempo11: My dog took his raw food upstairs and ate it in my bed. How's your night going?
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@llvvzz: What woman say right before they kill you: Wow. Fine. Whatever. No problem. I'm not mad. Nothing's wrong. Sure, stay friends with your ex.
@ANNIEwayyyy: Every since my Grandma discovered Netflix she’s been calling me w/ suggestions like “ok write this down, it’s called Friends, F-R-I-E-.....”
@freshestginger: If I got a boyfriend I wouldn't know what to do... What do they eat? How often do they need to be walked? Can they be house trained?