@_Tempo11: My dog took his raw food upstairs and ate it in my bed. How's your night going?
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@just1fool: To convert Celsius to Fahrenheit to double Celsius and add thirty. To convert someone to Mormonism you double the wives and add 17 kids.
@causticbob: Few people knew that Albert Einstein had a brother that was an evil scientist who created a monster from body parts. His name was Frank
@ixSEANxi: Ya know those scenes where the guy shoves everything off the table and throws a woman on it yeah I've only done that with pizza