@gmossii: My dog understands four words: his name, food, outside and Antidisestablishmentarianism.
@stereoskyline: Procrastination has taught me how to do 30 minutes of work in 8 hours and 8 hours of work in 30 minutes.
- My toddler, looking me dead in the eye while he feeds his dinner to the dog
@818Newbie: I'm as nervous as a United Airlines standby passenger.
@MensPictures: School be like
@SodomyClown: The Nationwide commercial didn't make me feel anything but I once dropped my chicken nuggets and cried for an hour and forty minutes.