@just1fool: My dog wouldn't shut up so I told him I killed the mailman. He was jealous but proud of me.
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@nerdreign: Some days it's little things, the tone of his voice or his words when we're alone, that help me realize I'd rather have the insurance money.
@thenatewolf: Me: I think the coolest sport is horse golf Guy: do you mean polo? Me: [realizing he isn't classy enough to know about horse golf] yes
@Ristolable: Every time you get a haircut, you're essentially returning your last haircut and exchanging it for the exact same thing
@Cheeseboy22: Startle and amuse your cat by replacing its kitty litter with Poprocks. (Ladies: feel free to share this idea on your pinny website thing.)