@DonQuickoats: My dogs are barking a lot lately but I think it is because their performance appraisals are coming up
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@tree_bro: "Tens of Thousands of Ants Killed", reads the headline of Ant Daily newspaper every single day. It is hard to be an ant.
@jabba_jabba_jaw: Me: But God, where did the second set of footprints go? God: That's when you were dating that psycho. I wasn't sticking around for that.
@BoutCrazed: The way I see it, the only thing my daughter's little "boyfriend" needs to know about me is I ain't afraid to go back to prison.