@JPHaddadio: My dog's frightened to walk across shiny floors and won't eat dog food unless I heat it up. I have a feeling he'd be a flop out in nature.
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@ValeeGrrl: ME: my husband wears a pair of jorts the week I'm ovulating DOCTOR: no i meant are you on any form of hormonal birth control ME: ah. no.
@YUCKYBOT: The difference between my "Maine lobster" and my "main lobster" is boiling water or a high five.