@longwall26: "My dream is to create something that both dogs and fraternity brothers will enjoy chasing with equal vigor." -- inventor of the frisbee
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@K_blue: Playing hide and seek in my office building because they can't fire you if they can't find you.
@misfarber: Poor helium. I like to imagine there's a shelium out there somewhere, waiting gaseously
@JMNuch23: When a girl tells you how many guys she's slept with, multiply by 3 and add the number of guys in her phone named Tyler