@clarkekant: My electric toothbrush ran out of batteries so I had to brush with my acoustic.
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@iGreenMonk: I'm so embarrassed. I just learned that that Pringles holder on my treadmill is for water bottles!
@lawyerthoughts: Just when I think I'm 100% against the death penalty, I see a bright yellow hummer taking up two parking spots.
@IamEnidColeslaw: at my high school reunion everyone kept asking where my date was so I finally told them my dog ate him. no one laughed
@hotdogsladies: Conjecture: At some point in 2013, our neighbors will get so high that they accidentally sell their own weed. For weed money. To buy weed.