@BadaBinge: My ex gf came from the land down under, no not Australia, Hell.
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@david8hughes: [phone rings] Guy: is your refrigerator running? Me: yes my refrigerator is runn- Fridge [grabs phone]: hello? Yeah actually I do crossfit
@beefman138: Dear people filming disasters : You need to zoom out before running for your lives. Nobody likes blurry footage, you selfish animals.
@goldengateblond: OBAMA: I want to close Gitmo GOP: no OBAMA: But you haven't even— GOP: no OBAMA: ... GOP: no OBAMA: I'm resigning GOP: no OBAMA: haha gotcha