@BadaBinge: My ex gf came from the land down under, no not Australia, Hell.
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@WheelTod: *Prosecution points to badger*: Objection! This animal has no place in court! Defense: Your honor, the badger is prosecuting the witness
@KeetPotato: we have ways of making you talk mr bond [introduces dave] this is dave, he's a vegan "OK ENOUGH"
@LoveNLunchmeat: People judge public housing, but it's cheap and your neighbors sell you drugs so I'm not sure I see the problem...
@mattZillaaaa: My bank called me for suspicious activity on my account & I was like "no, I went out last night"