@scottthetwat: My ex GF turned out to be anorexic. Gradually I just saw less and less of her.
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@imagine_vegas: Still haven't cashed in my winning megamillions ticket...scared the $6 will make my friends treat me different
@BradBroaddus: I overheard my neighbor tell someone on the phone that I was creepy. I was so mad I almost crawled out from under the bed & confronted her.
@krishna_van: A horse, a penguin and a chimp walked into a bar and that's when I realised I was drunk.