@MrSandeepP: My ex is going to make some guy very happy one day but completely miserable the rest of the time.
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@Kyle_Lippert: Go to Starbucks. Tell them your name is Dad. Hide in the crowd. Listen as the hipster barista says "Dad?..Dad?..DAD?..DAD?!" & starts crying
@AphroditeAfter5: My boyfriend wants to do it like three times a week-----together. He's so demanding!
@ghostkrogh: [at funeral] My brother was so realistic and sensible. I guess you could say- *casket is lowered into the ground* -he was down to earth.
@Amburglar_: Mad at your man? Five minutes before he gets home, turn on "Pitch Perfect" then hide the remote in the dishwasher.