@MrSandeepP: My ex is going to make some guy very happy one day but completely miserable the rest of the time.
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@Amburglar_: Sochi is doing that thing where they manically try to clean the house 10 minutes before company arrives. But the house is Russia.
@Fickle_Filly: Terminate an unwanted conversation with someone you haven't seen for years with the words, "Wow. You've aged badly..."
@anylaurie16: Changed ex's name in my cell to Do Not Engage. Unfortunately, his middle name Not doesn't show up when he texts.
@Dawn_M_: Just once I'd like the guy hired to kill me to complete the job and not fall in love with me.