@mindintheshadow: My ex is looking for a job but I don't think satan is retiring anytime soon so I suppose she'll be unemployed for a while.
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@offbeatoliv: I like how Angelina waited to divorce Brad Pitt until Jen got married. Well played Maleficent...well played...
@mommy_cusses: My son cuddled up to my bump and was talking about how he could see the baby and it would have been cute if I were pregnant.
@ThePocketJustin: My phone case doesn't expose the logo on the back. So it could be anything. I could be speaking on two mirrors with foam in the middle.
@Lakelandr: There's never been a single day in my life when I thought to myself " thank god the cops are here"