@chagger73: My ex told me I'd never find another woman like her. nnI don't think she was expecting the high 5 and happy dance I did right after.
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@juliussharpe: People hiking with a giant stick never seem any better at hiking than the rest of us.
@Poutymcgee: "THE PLATYPUS HERE TASTES LIKE SHIT! DO NOT ORDER IT!" I shout in the face of a confused and frightened old lady at the zoo.
@clindsaysway: Just finished reading the Declaration of Independence to my kids, and they went to live with their dad