@sirmunchie: My ex wife claims I have "commitment issues" like I didn't just wait in line for 30 minutes to get a hot dog at Costco.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@FeelingMervis: I've had intimate problems all my life. I just can't get close to someone without feeling insecure. You said internet problems? Nevermind.
@xLiserx: My autocorrect just changed "I'm off" to "I'm DTF" and changed a casual conversation with my boss into an H.R meeting.