@VapingSonic: My favorite Bible story is the one where thousands more people show up to Jesus' party than RSVP'd but he still had enough cake for everyone
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@DaddyJew: Coworker: people around the office think you're too controlling Me: what's that? Coworker: oh, sorry *raises hand*
@DanielRCarrillo: "I'm a green onion and I'm here to say, I can be enjoyed most every day." -A rapscallion
@peaceintruth1: I'm at my quickest when I try to follow someone out of the bathroom so I don't have to touch the handle.