@NurseMurderer: My favorite part of eating alone at this trendy restaurant was when the waitress asked if I had cats because I had cat hair, "all over."
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@VeryLonelyLuke: Only 2 kids made it out of my Jedi class. One killed the padawans. The other was abandoned in the desert I'm dreading that class reunion.
@RedBeard3000: Officer: have you been drinking? Me: no sir 0: you were swerving M: Twitter O: oh, I'm on Twitter what's your handle M: yes, I was drinking
@THEDUTHCHESS: A poster with a mugshot saying "Have you seen this man" So I rang up and said No. You have to do your bit for society .