@NurseMurderer: My favorite part of eating alone at this trendy restaurant was when the waitress asked if I had cats because I had cat hair, "all over."
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@AimeeHelene1: *holds door for someone* Them: This weather... Me: No. *starts pulling door closed on them* T: *pulls on door* Me: *holding door closed* No.
@rudetanks: The cop said it was an outstanding warrant, dad. And you said id never amount to anything
@WilliamAder: If "six degrees" is true, somebody tell somebody to tell somebody to tell somebody to tell somebody to tell Scarlett Johansson I said "Hi."
@ruinedpicnic: me: wow a pegasus flying horse: actually Pegasus was just one horse we all have different names me: oh whats yours flying horse: Pegasus 2