@NurseMurderer: My favorite part of eating alone at this trendy restaurant was when the waitress asked if I had cats because I had cat hair, "all over."
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@DBrownpants: If you ask me to review a restaurant, I have two answers. "The hamburgers are good." And, "They don't have hamburgers."
@thefosterer: If I ever lose my girlfriend in the mall I just start checking other girls out and bam there she is yelling at me
@theshamingofjay: TRUMP: I'm building a wall to keep Mexicans out. AMERICANS: I'm going to Canada if Trump is elected. CANADIANS: We need to build a wall.
@echoVista: You just HAD to let snakes and spiders on the Ark, didn't you Noah? Way to go, man. Way. To. Go.