@anarchicwolf: My favorite pastime is roasting marshmallows over the bridges I burn.
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@BuckyIsotope: MAMA Be quiet Freddie JUST KILLED A MAN As your lawyer I- PUT A GUN AGAINST HIS HEAD Just- PULLED THE TRIGGER- We plead guilty, Your Honor
@TheToddWilliams: [creation] GOD: You all have a divine purpose HORSE: I will plow man's field COW: I will give man milk GUINEA PIG: I will test man's shampoo
@TheBoydP: When accused by a woman a man's first instinct is to deny. We're not lying, we're just buying time to remember what you're talking about...
@comer310: Bro: *on phone* Babe. Babe. Babe. Babe. BABE! Dude: You're so whipped. Bro: What? I just got her to rent Babe instead of The Notebook.