@OkieGirl405: My favorite people are the ones that like to pass judgement on others because they have obviously lead a perfect life
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@lwhit_the_boss: If Jay-Z is married to Beyonce and is a multimillionaire and still has 99 problems then there ain't no hope for the rest of us
@pleatedjeans: [sees kid crying in grocery store] hey little guy [kneels down to his level] Can you please move you're blocking the Cinnamon Toast Crunch?
@nice_mustard: endless breadsticks. bottomless fries. yawning abyss of onion rings. HOWLING DESOLATE CHASM OF POTATO SKINS
@TheBoydP: Hey Mexican food restaurant waiter, if the basket is empty you don't have to ask. YES I WANT MORE CHIPS!