@Black__Elvis: My favorite Star Trek episode is that one where Captain Kirk saves the Klingons hundreds of dollars on hotel reservations.
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@bourgeoisalien: I stop strangers from talking by smelling their hair & saying,"You smell like Pa. Pa loved his wood chipper. Never did find them drifters."
@PeachCoffin: I explained ‘gluten allergy’ to my grandma and she sighed and told me they ate leather belts during WWII to keep from starving