@MmeSurly: My favorite thing about famous people is that they can be "brave" and "daring" by just leaving the house in stupid looking clothes.
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@TheBeerGuy73: Well, Clarice, have the lambs stopped screaming? ROFLMFAO! JK! Lolz Ttyl KK Ur BFF, Hannibal ~ Hannibal Lecter discovers text messages
@singwithTaffy: Please, by all means, call my landline. I'll reply with a postcard attached to a helium balloon
@Jeff_G_Nixon: [barber shop] BARBER: what can we do for you today? MEDUSA: well.. [removes hat] BARBER: MEDUSA: BARBER: so do you want more or less snakes?
@notacroc: Me: *holds up my phone showing my tweet has a total of 6 favorites* Bouncer: you still can't go in