@YoungFunE: My financial situation is so bad, I'M being sponsored by a child in Africa
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@BeamishBoi: *throws goods on conveyor belt* Cashier: is that all sir? Me:"Nope. You got change for a trophy?"
@_davidlucas_: There are 70,000 Jehovah's Witnesses in Melbourne for a conference. So I'll be answering the door naked this weekend.
@SteveSuckington: "What if I tried to put a ball somewhere and you tried to stop me" -guy who invented sports
@desusnice: someone using bare hands to put salad on a plate is letting you know they're not here for discussions about etiquette or anything really