@TheSharona06: My Fitbit was delivered today. It's still sitting in the mailbox because I don't want to walk all the way out there.
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@Sassafrantz: I just introduced my date as P. Sherman, 42 Wallaby Way, Sydney because I forgot his name. How's your night?
@CopBroughtPizza: [galileo's wife walks in] *quickly pointing the telescope from the neighbor's window to the sky* i was just studying the... phases of venus.
@ChaseMit: "Can we stop for a second? I forgot everyone's names again." - me, if I was a character on Game of Thrones
@jazmasta: There must be an easier way to transport long poles across canyons other than walking across a tightrope carrying one pole at a time.