@TheWeirdWorld: My fondest childhood memory is thinking that $100 is a lot of money.
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@Fazio_N: "What aisle has the milk?" "Sir, this is a library." *whispers* "What aisle has the milk?"
@Skinny_fatbloke: If you're best man at your mates second wedding, after being best man at the first, is it ok to start my speech with "Welcome back everyone"??
@Smethanie: Baby, you're a firework: You hold my interest for about 15 minutes and scare the shit out of my dog.