@joshgondelman: My girlfriend and I are thinking about adopting a dog because we've had no luck trying to have one naturally.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@XplodingUnicorn: What I was supposed to teach my kid before kindergarten: 1) phonics 2) writing 3) math What I actually taught her: 1) the dance to Thriller
@murrman5: *buys Sushi for Dummies* *preheats oven* *reads first page of Sushi for Dummies* *turns off oven*
@Screwoff315: I'm tired of this long distance relationship! Time to move the liquor cabinet to the living room!
@AverageClo: Why do people say "To be frank..." when they're about to be brutally honest? WHAT IF FRANK LIED!? WHAT IF I WANT TO BE MARLENE!?