@vineyille: "My god," I whisper as the food arrives. "Just as the prophecy foretold."
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@Sorrowscopes: Gemini: You may find yourself wondering if you're dreaming or not. A simple test is to punch a cop in the face.
@david8hughes: If your dog & your baby are fighting, it's important to leave them to it so that a pack leader can be established.
@RealSamHarwood: A homeless man randomly asked me if I was from Minnesota yesterday, so I replied, "no, but once I stabbed a guy who grew up in Minneapolis"
@DirtMcTurd: "Heres your social security card, you need it forever! Its made of paper, don't laminate it. Good luck." -The Government