@SaddestFinger: My grandfather told me that during the war he was exposed to irritants like pepper spray and mustard gas. Now he's a seasoned vet.
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@UncleDuke1969: Me: What are my choices again? Pollster: Donald Trump… Me: Or? Pollster: Puppymonkeybaby. Me: … Pollster: Well? Me: I’m thinking.
@sarcasticmommy4: My kids say I need to stop trying to embarrass them but joke's on them because I'm not even trying.
@Reverend_Scott: ????LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR ????LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR ????LET THE BODIES HIT THE- "Carl, you're fired. You're a horrible mortician."