@JarrettsPosts: my grandpa doesn’t use his blinker because “its no one else’s business where he’s going”
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@ShutUpThatsWho: [1st night w/Russian bride] "take yr panties off" [smaller panties underneath] "them too" [even smaller panties underneath] "damnit..."
@Steven37366100: Me : Well, despite the difficulties, we’ve made the best of a bad situation Life: Yeah, I’m going to need those lemons back
@OurMarketingGuy: Why do Americans choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?
@shutupmikeginn: A trailer in a movie theater ended with "November 20th" and a guy loudly said, "thats my birthday" and a random guy said "happy birthday"