@coolandbreezey: My guardian angel deserves a raise
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@Book_Krazy: "Last call for flight 254" [Runs to gate] "You barely made it" [out of breath] This isnt my flight. I just wanted to tell you I'm a vegan
@gerryhallcomedy: My son used to check under the bed for monsters. So once I hid under there - so he'd see me and laugh. Anyway, child therapy is pricey.
@daemonic3: It's 4:20 do you know what that means?!? It means only 40 minutes left to get 8 hours of work done.
@lovemyboots111: How do you know your man is cheating? When he drives by her place the wifi connects