@CoreyNotKori: My handwriting has slowly morphed from cheerleader to serial killer to elephant with a paint brush.
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@heymonroe: That moment of panic when you accidentally swipe left on Bae while getting food off your phone.
@heidi420x: You have to PAY for a speeding ticket?! I thought it was a reward for beating other drivers..
@Tmoney68: "Stomach...Lungs...Kidneys....Heart." - Me, at my organ recital. (Not even slightly sorry)
@david8hughes: [in class] Me: hey, can I borrow a pen? Guy: sure, black or blue? Me [sweating & swelling up]: you got one for bee stings?