@DrinkingatWork: My head feels like something Picasso would have drawn.
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@tuckerflodman: *Snowman wakes up in hospital* "What happened to me?!" Snow Doctor: Don't worry you're fine. But... what did you think a snow blower did?
@PlopWaffle: Lois : Clark, are those binoculars? Clark Kent : Yes, I can't find my glasses. Lois : Put them down for a second. Clark : Lois : Clark : No
@shwebby3: Went off roading with my prius but ended up getting stuck on a bonsai tree in neighbor's front yard
@ShutUpThatsWho: Scissors [to Rock]: So you beat me & I beat Paper but how does Paper beat you? [cut to Paper meeting a hitman] Make it look like an accident