@RoyalThough: My heart says food, food and more food...but my jeans say, for the love of God, eat salad😪
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@FeverFlave: *sticks a pencil in your ear and manually rewinds you back before you opened your mouth*
@UncleDuke1969: "Put cheese on it." "It's not-" "Put cheese on it." "Really now, you-" "Everything gets better with cheese on it." "Sir, it's a BROKEN LEG."
@TheAlexNevil: Me: How's it look? Doc: You have 2 months to live M: WHAT?? You're my dentist! D: Then you don't need to come back for a cleaning in 6 mos