@liberalcannon: My hobbies are scrolling through twitter, charging my phone and being generally dissatisfied with things.
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@daemonic3: To whoever has my voodoo doll, can you stop making me stare at my phone all day? This isn't funny. I just want to live life again.
@trevso_electric: If diet and exercise are not working for you, try actually dieting and actually exercising.
@TheThomason: Before handing your wallet and wife's necklace over to that angry gunman, pause to consider how sweet it would be if your son became Batman.
@WilliamRodgers: It's impossible for TWO dudes to ride ONE motorcycle without it looking romantic...