@darksideang: My husband gets so cranky when I come home from the pool with only a fraction of the kids I left with
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@Be___Dope: [text] Her: I picked up buffalo wings. Me: * moves furniture around * rolls out plastic sheeting
@shawnspree: Smile and the world smiles with you. Laugh and the world wants you to stop looking at your phone and drive.
@Laser_Cat: The guy who invented doors must have been a big hero to the thousands of people standing around outside their homes.